Thought Chunk #1

A few years ago, mostly during my senior year of college and the year after, I wrote down some things in pseudo-poetry style that I have come to call "thought chunks," because I don't think it's quite fair to call them poetry. I am planning on posting some of these here. I wrote mostly when I was feeling sad/anguished but I think I usually managed to keep some measure of hope alive. The one I am posting today I wrote after listening to and reflecting on Florence and the Machine's Cosmic Love (before I put my writing I'll quote the lines from Cosmic Love that I found particularly inspiring). I didn't title it at the time, but I think I am going give it the title "The Offense" referencing Kierkegaard and John 6, since those things were definitely on my mind at the time. So here it is, let me know if you have any thoughts or ways that you think I can improve my writing.

Quotes from Cosmic Love: "The stars, the moon, they have all been blown out, you left me in the dark. No dawn, no day, I'm always in this twilight, in the shadow of your heart." "Then I heard your heart beating you were in the darkness too, so I stayed in the darkness with you."

The Offense

I don't know my God, but my God knows me. 

I fail to comprehend the infinite, 

and I am left with feelings of awe and fear, 

wonder and doubt

It is thus left to me to inhabit this dark, desolate land of faith

I long to return to the illumined lands, 

where reason seems to rule

However, no matter my yearning, 

I remain in the twilight presence of my God, 

believing that day will come

And so it is my prayer that my soul remain with my God, 

even if chained and fettered it must be

For though there seems to be light elsewhere, 

only here have I found the words of eternal life

And it is to those words that I must cling.